Hipnotic Belly Dancing

Visions of Beauty

2009-11-17T09:48:00.000-08:00

I never thought myself a dancer. What does the word “dancer” evoke? If your answer is that of an Amazon woman, gray haired and never once having worn a size 8, than I am surely on the right track. That wasn’t your answer? What should become of me, then?
As with most everything in America, we do not meet the ideal. This much I’ve gathered--it includes unbearably blond hair, a gregarious bust line and legs miles long--all South Beach Diet and carb free, sporting pouty lips and a sun-kissed hue.
I am not this person.
You are not this person.
This person doesn’t exist…we exist, though.
We exist with our fat hips and crooked noses, our flabby arms and stretch marks, our short legs and bikini un-worthy bodies.
Let me offer this statement, then--perhaps our “wrongs” make us right. Do you ever recall someone’s perfections--the small pieces of all of us all that might make one ideal? Or do you remember that I am more Boticelli than Pamela Anderson? More so, even, I expect that you recall those things about me that remind you of you, or of those things about me that make me different than you.
And that, I think, is just fine, in fact, that is ideal. To be remembered, to be thought of, to be admired all for my lack of perfection, on account of my lack of perfection.
So for all the reasons I could think of not to dance--too fat, too tall, too graceless--they are now my reasons for dancing.
Self-consciousness has not a thing to do with the body--belief in beauty is beauty alone. It is not tactile or tangible. It is belief and thought and truth, it is you, it is me.
Do not allow false ideas of perfection to hide your beauty--you are your beauty.

Uninspired

2009-07-02T09:08:00.000-07:00

So, as it goes right now, I teach about 7 hours of dance per week. I don't know if thats a huge amount, I don't know if thats too little. I do know that I have another full-time job, so 7 additional hours per week, not including prep time (can we say choreographies and costuming?), can be daunting. I think this is due in large part to just feeling uninspired lately. Why is this happening? I have always been an "ideas" person. I don't normally have a problem thinking of something totally fun to do in class, or designing new moves to teach my students...but for the past few weeks, it's as if my mind is just a totally blank slate. Are all my ideas used up? Has the creative part of brain gone on a long-awaited holiday? The more I try to disect this problem, the bigger the problem gets. Where do I go from here? What's a girl to do? Focus on something new!

So my ladies and I had an awesome party to decorate our new troupe mascot, Vigay...a lovely, lumpy elephant covered in gems, glitter and jewelry. He is very special, and totally bizarre. More important than Vigay was our girl time. We talked, we ate, we laughed and as I recall there was a hookah involved...and it really brought my creativity back to where I want it--front and center! We talked about why we dance, what dancing does for us and to us, the exhilaration of being in front of an audience, the desire to dance outside of the box, as it were. And this whole time I had been thinking I've been doing too much. I realize now I have been doing too little.

Sure, I have been spending hours per week teaching basics, students coming and going, losing something of myself in the monotony I was feeling. I have been afraid to step outside of my dancing box. I was sticking to the same old same old largely in part of being afraid to fail. But what does that even mean? What would failure mean to a dance teacher? To a belly dancer? So I offer a workshop and no one comes, or 15 people come, or everyone loves it, or everyone hates it. Would that really matter? What would actually happen if the outcome wasn't as I had planned? The more I thought about it, the more I understood. I would just learn what works, learn what doesn't, and move on. That's it.

So here it goes:

August 1st--Turkish Workshop
August 7th--Moving to a new studio
August 29th--Makeup Workshop
Month of September--Bollywood!

That's what I'm talking about!

First Hipnotic Belly Dance Meetup

2009-06-03T08:41:00.000-07:00

So, we had our first official Hipnotic Belly Dance meetup on Sunday, May 31st. What a great time! My obvious, initial concern was that no one would show up; but thankfully, we had a group of 13, which was fantastic. I always have a serious case of anxiety when starting something new, even after all this time spent dancing and teaching, but once people started showing up, everything just seemed to flow. We ordered a round of drinks and that was it! Going around the table introducing ourselves, I realized that although everyone has a different reason for being a belly dancer or being interested in belly dancing, the bottom line was really self-confidence--either having some or needing a bit of a boost.

Although it felt wonderful to be in a group of beautiful, talented, intelligent women talking about something we all love in our own way, there was always something just below the surface; I'm not that good, I am afraid to do a solo, I could never show my stomach, People would laugh at me...Each of these remarks was immediately met with the other women shaking their heads in unity, giving words of encouragement or sharing a similar thought.

Of course this got me thinking about my own confidence issues. It's almost as if, as women, we need to hate things about ourselves or we feel guilty. We are never quite thin enough, tall enough, smart enough, sexy enough. Fill in your own blanks. I know I can, a thousand times over. So why do we feel this way?

Maybe it started with a comment in school, something a boyfriend said once, something we've seen on TV. But once we realize that what we are doesn't always mirror what we see around us, it's as if we have to find faults in ourselves every day from that day forward. But I think we can change that. How can we take our self-images, our egos, our confidences, and put them into the hands of anyone but ourselves? We need to take all of that back!

To change the way you feel about yourself, change the way you look at other women. Instead of noticing every "bad" attribute you feel someone has, focus on something great. Compliment at least one person every day in a true and genuine way. Say "thank you" and "you're welcome," and mean it. Give your brightest smile to someone who looks down in the dumps. Call your mother, call your sister, call your friend and tell her that you love her and that she is beautiful.

When you aren't so hard on other people, you will slowly stop being so hard on yourself. The ease of noticing the beauty in others will become ease in noticing the beauty in yourself.

So maybe this group of gorgeous ladies can start a revolution! Maybe we can accept ourselves and others for who we are, what we can do, our strengths, our weaknesses, our lumps, our bumps, and every single other thing that makes each of us the women we are.

Will you join us?